just another tearjerker

Starey-eyed daze
Staring vacantly into space
Living on the edge
from one daydream to the next
Sleep sometimes come
along come dreams so bad and bleak
along comes long waits for the dawn

Oh dear, don't worry
dreams are blurry
But reality is sharp
and sharp edges have consequences
I've watched my hopes and dreams
get cut sharply from reality
Like I watched the embers glow
The ashes fly out of my control

So now I pour my sick heart
on a piece of paper
Turning daydreams into poetry
Hoping one day you'll find me
or I'll find you 
and once again
my heart'll be
healthy.

Keep it simple, stupid.

Sometimes his dreams are scary
Sometimes his dreams are sad
but mostly they just make him mad
He wakes up alone
feeling guilty and mad

The smart thing would be
to pay no heed to them
But it becomes hard
to keep control
on the conscious mind
when such thoughts
make advances on
his subconscious mind

Surely the smart thing
would be continuing streak
otherwise all this
would be for nothing
As they say in his CA meetings
Keep it simple, stupid

He finds his vein from
the first try
and shoots just like 
in his dreams
'Hell yeah', he breathes
He's not so 'stupid'
after all

-jay

It is common for those in recovery to have occasional relapse dream. During sleep they once again experience what it is like to be using alcohol or drugs. In the dream they may be enjoying the experience or it may have all the qualities of a nightmare. Many people in recovery will wake up from this type of dream with feelings of guilt, as if they choose to have such an experience. They may even view it as an omen that they are about to relapse in reality
alcoholrehab

© dixitmrityunjay, 2020. September heart-to-hearts.

A dark room inside my head

Laughing and crying,
Sitting or lying,
Worse than dying,
Laughing and crying.

Alone and awake
In a bleak room all day;
All night I suffocate,
Alone and awake.

Love and Death
Both were red.
Now love is black, my friend
And time is of no essence,
Time is also black.
Only death is red
In the dark room inside my head.

@dixitmrityunjay, 2019. September heart-to-hearts

Stories are artifacts, not really made things which we can create (or take credit for), but preexisting objects we dig up.

Stephen King

This quote by Mr. King sums up my muse for this poem (well I guess then, poems are artifacts too!), which came to my mind out of nowhere one day while I was studying for my mid-semesters (engineering mathematics).

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Linked to dVerse Poetics. Laura Bloomsbury is hosting with the theme of “rooms”.

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Haiku #22: summer thunder

summer’s day in may
turns furiously rainy
summer thunde
r roars.

-jay
27/05/2020

linked to oln at dVerse where Grace is hosting. Everyone is welcome.
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© dixitmrityunjay, 2020. September heart-to-hearts.

Poem/Song: look through my eyes

moon shines on metal
and shadows break free
look through my eyes
and you will see
this nature laughing at me,
mockingly.

the sun the moon the stars
the heartless wind the birds and trees
all its glory and its beauty
look through my eyes
and you will see
its an illusion of happiness.

now I can remember my name
as all my pain has now turned black,
ghosts of past and dreams of death
are my peace of heart since you’ve left
my heart in pieces: secrets and regrets.

not ready to end but the end begins to show
like the river’s bed when it’s dead and shallow.

-jay

25/05/2020

© dixitmrityunjay, 2020. September heart-to-hearts.
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pic credit: VectorStock

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No more will I

No more will I
Lend my eyes
To your empty cries
disguises and lies.
No more will I
Hear your cries
From your empty eyes
the faces you hide.
No more will I
Care about your
Face and disguise
hiding snake eyes.

© dixitmrityunjay, 2020. September heart-to-hearts.

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Minutes to Night Curfew

In the fading city bustle;
Dusk deepens towards dark;
The heart shaped leaves rustle,
Crore crickets chirping;
Turning leaves into megaphones;
In yellow summer evening,
Standing middle of the road;
The old Peepal Tree fixed in time;
Sings its sacred fables,
I listen transfixed.

Linked to dVerseQuadrille #104′ where De Jackson (aka WhimsyGizmo) is hosting. Prompt , ‘Just fix your muse on a poem of precisely 44 words, including some form of the word fix‘.

In my city, the seven’o clock curfew has been in effect since two days after a sudden surge in the number of patients, I forgot all about the curfew this evening as I was walking past this old Peepal tree, I sat beside it for sometime, listening. I clicked a photo from my mobile and on the screen I noticed it was quarter to 7, I headed towards home at a run to beat the curfew, all the while I could hear police sirens and curfew announcements on megaphones. I hope all this will come to an end soon and things will change for the better.

jay

19/05/2020

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© dixitmrityunjay, 2020. September heart-to-hearts

Liebster Award and 1000+ Likes

Recently I was nominated for my second Liebster Award. Coincidentally, September heart-to-hearts also crossed the mark of 1000 likes the same day! I’m very happy and excited. This is my fourth award nomination and I cherish all of them very dearly. They’re a sign of how helpful and encouraging this community is and also that I’ve to keep up the good work!

I’d like to humbly thank Anish for this nomination, who is the writer of an awesome poetry blog The Poetic Prism where he posts very creative poems and short stories.

here are the rules for this award !!

  • Thank the blogger who nominated you, and provide a link to their blog
  • Answer the 11 questions given to you
  • Nominate 11 other bloggers
  • Ask your nominees 11 questions
  • Notify your nominees once you have uploaded your post

Answering Anish‘s Questions

1) If you could recommend a book, which one would it be and why?
*Steal Like an Artist: 10 Things Nobody Told You About Being Creative by Austin Kleon, This book answers so many questions in a very interesting and efficient manner. It is strangely very relatable.”Practice productive procrastination” “Inertia is the death of creativity”You’re bound to finish this book in one go and afterwards to reread the snippets so as to absorb its essence completely. 🙂 View all my reviews

2) What’s the last song you listened to?
*Under My Thumb by Rolling Stones.

3) What is your most treasured possession?
*My ride, Pulsar 150, my father gifted it to me last year on my 18th birthday.

4) Describe yourself in three words.
*Not a fan of number games like this one, so pass.

5) Which three people would you invite to a dinner party (contemporary, historical, or fictional)?
*Stephen King, Eminem and Wonder Woman… lol this number game on the other hand, was very fun!

6) What’s the last movie that you watched?
*Shutter Island (for the 3rd time actually!)

7) What made you click the follow button on my blog?
*You write wonderful poems & stories and I didn’t wanna miss out on anything, also you appreciate your fellow bloggers with your kind comments and likes, I wanted to return the favor 🙂

8) What’s the best gift you’ve gotten and from who?
*Wow, I’ve already answered this question, its my ride, Pulsar 150, my father gifted it to me last year on my 18th birthday. It’s both, my most treasured possession and the best gift I’ve gotten as of now!

9) Are you in your dream job? If not, what is your dream job?
*Right now I’m in college, completing my Bachelor’s in Mechanical Engineering, I know you’re an engineer yourself Anish , I was surprised and happy to know that! My aim is to take a product from an idea to the marketplace! Any job that’ll help me achieve my aim is my dream job.

10) Hardback. Paperback or E-book?
*I’d love to have a collection of hardback editions of all the books Ive read. But that’s for later because they are mighty expensive, as of now I only have two, presently I do all my reading on E-books.

11) Which blog is currently your favorite?
*D’verse Poets Pub is currently my favorite blog, it is a place for poets and writers to gather to celebrate poetry. Everyone is welcome.

Questions for my nominees

  1. Is blogging your profession or just a hobby if yes then would you mind making it as a source of income in future?
  2. Name your favorite genres of music and your favorite song in each genre.
  3. How do you attract new readers? Describe the methods you’ve used and their impact on site traffic?
  4. Do you have any pet peeves?
  5. Which two posts from my blog do you like the most and why?
  6. What piece of writing are you the most proud of?
  7. What’s an irrational fear you have?
  8. What is your favorite color?
  9. Name your favorite artists and your favorite artworks.
  10. If for a day you get some super powers then which super power would it be?
  11. Presently, what brings you the most joy in life?

My Nominees

  1. CalmKate (aroused)
  2. Avni (Avni’s Bookshelf)
  3. Ishaan Sharma (Ishaan’s Blog)
  4. https://fantasynovel1.wordpress.com/
  5. QueridaJ (intotheindigo)
  6. Abhin Thulasidas
  7. Vivek (Verses for life)
  8. Wild Heart (Wild Sacred Crazy)
  9. Rashi Singh (Fictive Fitness)
  10. Revived Writer
  11. Piyush Singh (The Perception Square)

This is the first time I’m following all the rules and nominating 11 people for the award, I admire and very much appreciate these talented people, that being said, it was very hard to choose from all the awesome blogs and creators that are a part of this community, so if you’re reading this and think you want to participate, please notify me in the comments and I’d be very glad to nominate you and see your take on the questions! You deserve the award for the amazing posts you publish on your blog 🙂

Lots of love and take care ❤️

jay

18/05/2020

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© dixitmrityunjay, 2020. September heart-to-hearts

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