When life leaves you blind, The hounds of winter are at your door And the night has seen your mind. You’re going numb, you’re leaving behind Footprints in the snow. You hit the floor When Life leaves you blind. You hear a voice—a melody kind, Fainting, trapped under ice, underfloor. And the night has seen your mind. You lift your eyes, you find A hazy shade of winter, forevermore. When life leaves you blind. The hounds are in your shrine, They’re pawing at your core And the night has seen your mind. And you, beautiful-brave, love of mine are battling with heart beating this winter’s war. When life leaves you blind And the night has seen your mind.
© M. Jay Dixit, September heart-to-hearts, 2022 All Rights Reserved
posted over at dverse
A/N: This is my first time writing a Villanelle, I fell in love with this form when I read “Mad Girl’s Love Song” by Sylvia Plath and “Do not go gentle into that good night” by Dylan Thomas. I hope you’ll like mine. If there’s something wrong, please feel free to tell me in the comment section.
~Jay ❤
I adore vilanelles. This one was nicely crafted. You chose two very good lines for the refrain.
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Thank you, dear friend ❤
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My pleasure, Jay 😁
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Meisterverse! Fine, smooth inclusion of titles. Salute!
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Big thanks! 🙂
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Lovely poem, Jay. I especially like the last verse! ❤
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Thank you very much, Cheryl 💖
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Well done with the form and the prompt. I especially like the final two stanzas!
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Thank you💖
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winter, pawing! Nice
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Thank you very much 💖
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Love the line ” and night has seen your mind”! Nicely done, Jay.
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Thank you very much, Punam 💖
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This speaks to me especially with the addition of the song/video. My son used to listen to Linkin Park (maybe still does). I think it is so relatable when going through difficult times, as is your villanelle with its powerful lines.
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Thank you very much, Mish! It’s nice that your son listened to Linkin Park. In fact, when I was in 6th grade, Linkin Park was the first english-language band that I listened to. They were my favorite 💖
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That is so interesting!
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Great villanelle and I can feel the winter
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Thanks a lot, Björn 🙂
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I haven’t written one of these in a while. I think you did a great job! Especially, with the challenges of weaving in song titles.
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Thank you very much. I’m glad you like it 🙂
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I love Villanelles and this is no exception ❤
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Aw! Thank you💖
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Jay, the secret to a good villanelle is choosing good repeating lines, and you did that. You captured the atmosphere of being hunted by winter and how it messes with your mind very well. I hope to see you writing more villanelles.
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Thanks a lot, Lisa! I’m glad you liked it. ❤️🙂
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You’re very welcome 🙂
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Beautifully crafted villanelle!
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Many thanks, Kate 💖
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“The night has seen your mind”…that does capture winter perfectly! (K)
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Thank you very much 🙂
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Thank you!
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You have written a beautiful villanelle!
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Thank you PPP 💖
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